3/16

I met with Alex last Wednesday twice in the morning.  We met at 11, then he had class at 12 and then we met again at 1 until I had class at 2.  Rehearsal went really well though.  We met again in the basement of Swem, it has come to be our little spot where we close the doors and nobody seems to walk by or hear us which is good.  Since we knew all our lines for the first 5 pages we really worked on the actions.  When we rehearsed in front of the class the week before I remember one part where he asked if I was coming back to bed and I said I don't know but I was already sitting in bed with him so I had to get up and walk away and say I don't know again.  By then I was laughing because clearly I had not cued that right.  Anyways, we worked on when I would get up and go to the bathroom, when I would turn on the light, when I would be brushing my hair or changing.  We needed to get some other actions going on so that it wasn't just us sitting in bed.  The second time we met I practiced more of my lines that came later on in the play where I had more to say.  Believe it or not I actually remembered the lines!  It was the part that I've had the most to say where it's more than just one or two sentences.  Alex and I are getting a lot more comfortable with each other and getting together to rehearse has become fun rather than just working.
     Later on that day when we had class we rehearsed our part in front of the class.  The first scene where we have to be having sex was a little uncomfortable...we had to practice that at least five times, discussing with the class different positions and then trying them out.  Then me having to work on my screaming from orgasming.  Definitely a little weird and I started getting really uncomfortable by the third time I had to be screaming and thrusting... Besides that scene I think Alex and I did pretty well.  I had all my lines down and walked away from the bed on cue so it definitely flowed a lot better than the first time.  The only thing we didn't do was know what we were actually talking about in the scene.  We hadn't done any research on some of the conversation that Frankie and Johnny were having so we didn't really know how we should be acting or sounding when talking.  Like I don't know what fifty-third and tenth in Brooklyn is or what Prizzi's Honor is....we need to do a little researching.

3/14

Today we learned how your words and body motions are related or connected. The length of the actions and words should be intertwined.  Later we laid on the ground with our eyes closed and hummed.  We were able to push the hums to the center spot between our eyes and be able to feel the vibrations.  When the professor came and shook my feet out I could feel my hums moving with my body.  Then the professor told me to make the noises of a cat having an orgasm.  I had my eyes closed and starting moaning/screaming meow.  There were other animal noises too like a sheep bahing.  Then we moved around and played with the other animals.  Ivy asked me to be her pet so I then sat with her and meowed.  Then we partnered up and I got to drive my partner around while she had her eyes closed.  I know she was supposed to trust me but even I was nervous!  When we started to have to drive at higher speeds and run faster there were a lot of cars running around too.  I think I was actually less nervous when she was driving me and I had my eyes closed.  I trusted her and it was easier because I didn’t have someone else relying on me so heavily.  Why is it sometimes easier to trust someone else rather than yourself?


I know this isn't much of an acting related question but I did find it strange that I felt more comfortable being the car rather than the driver and it got me thinking.  I think I'm the type of person who gets really nervous under pressure.  Like in a soccer game when we're losing a game and I know that the coach is relying on me to do something like score or assist but for some reason I just seem to break down.  I don't like being under pressure even though I know it happens all the time in life and I know that I need to get better at dealing with it.  I don't think I have much confidence in myself when it comes to those situations but I know that other people show a lot of confidence in me.  Why is that?  I don't know why I can't seem to find it in myself even though other people can.  I wonder if other people feel the same way.  Like the way I had confidence in Ivy, I wonder if she was really nervous about driving me around while I had my eyes closed.  I felt comfortable trusting her and she seemed calm and confident but I wonder if on the inside she was freaking out a little bit about whether or not she would run me into another person or a wall or something.  Just something I was thinking about...    

2/28

I met with Alex in the morning from 9:30 - 10:30 in swem basement again.  We were supposed to meet Sunday night at around 10 but when the time came around I was so tired and luckily Alex agreed to meeting the following morning.  I felt bad though because he told me that 9:30 was the earliest he had woken up all semester!  He's crazy.  Anyways, we read through the script and got down the first five pages.  Then we practied our sex scene...I felt a little more comfortable because I knew him a little better.  The first few times we did it we were in an awkward position and it didn't look or feel real/natural.  Alex suggested we positioned ourselves a little differently and it made a world of difference.  We definitely need to practice it a lot more and probably make the scene longer and not rush as much.  I had class at 11so we had only practiced for an hour but the more time we spend together the better so we can establish more of a relationship and chemistry not only between ourselves but for our roles too.